


True Feelings About Certain Things.

by FanGirlUnderTheSun



Category: Chicago PD (TV)
Genre: Afther Shift, English is not my native language, F/M, Fighting, Hank Feels Guilty, Kenny Rixton is your partner, Knowing Hank's True Colors, Porn whit a litte plot, Pregnancy, When Hank Gets Home, hurtful words
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-04-05
Updated: 2018-11-04
Packaged: 2019-04-18 17:37:22
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 8
Words: 10,921
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14218260
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/FanGirlUnderTheSun/pseuds/FanGirlUnderTheSun
Summary: Your life with hank is beautiful in many ways, but in others it can be very exhausting, especially lately that his beaten conscience was a time bomb.





	1. Trusted my honesty.

**Author's Note:**

> Hello! I love Chicago PD so I did this. I really hope that you enjoy it. English is not my first language, so bare whit me a little, and of course suggestions are more than welcome.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> You let yourself go a little when he gets home from congressmen Graynor's party.

It was just me and the TV tonight, Hank was at a congressman party. I decided not to go because politics wasn't my thing, or Hank's actually. But he was friend's with this particular politician.

I was all curled up in Hank's couch, bored to dead passing through the channels. I was about to go to sleep early, when suddenly I heard the door "he's home" I thought.

"Baby i'm home!"

He didn't enter he staid in his living room entry just smiling at me, he looked beautiful smiling. 

Apparently the vision of me curled up in his couch was something he liked, because he stood there for a moment just looking at me. 

"You look perfect, you know?"

"Ho, I know baby" he laughed.

"Come, sit next to me, tell me how was the party?" 

"Well, it was boring but I liked that Graynor showed empathy for the police."

Of course it was boring, what was he expecting.

"A politician who shows empathy for the police, that's new."

"Yes it's pretty weird actually" He said laughing. 

"I met burguess's new boyfriend" That was interesting. 

"And how is he?" 

"He's an assholl, I never thought I'd say this, but Ruzek is better than that guy." He was so dramatic sometimes.

"And exactly, how do you know that he's an assholl baby? Because you seem very sure of yourself."

"I just know that he's an assholl, ok?"

I wasn't really paying attention to him, all I could think about was "Jesus, I'm horny."

"I trust your judgement , but I don't want to keep talking about who is an assholl or not."

I kissed him, but he broke the kiss.

"You asked, I told you (Y/N), and what do you want to do exactly?." The game was on.

"I want you to stand in front of me." 

"What?" He looked surprised. 

"You heard me." He continued to do what I told him to do.

"Good boy." 

I started to unbuckle his belt and lower his pants, followed by his boxers, taking out his imprisoned member, I licked the tip and put half in my mouth he groaned at the feel of my tongue, he grabbed my heir and began to move his hips. Suddenly he broke me away from him. 

"Baby stop, you're gonna make me come, you don't want that don't you?" He was right.

"Not at all." 

I got up from the couch and gave him a passionate kiss while removing his tie.

"You look very handsome in that suit."

"Me handsome?"

"Yes, look what you do to me."

I took off my very small nightgown and I wasn't wearing any underwear obviously he didn't took his ayes of me.

"No underwear sweaty? You're such a little slut."

He said this wile pinching my nipples. His words and the nipple pinching was turning me on even more, I took his hand and put his fingers on my very wet entrance 

"Is that for me?"

"Yes." I kissed him and finished removing his shirt.

"Lay dow (Y/N)." 

I lay dow on the couch and he kissed my breasts, like always he spend a good amount of time on them. He lower himself to my pussy and began to lick it hard like he usually does, I was going crazy, it felt so good. I wasn't moaning anymore, I was screaming. He was doing his job on my intimacy while he looked me in the eyes, he looked so hot. He stopped and placed himself on top of me, putting himself inside me.

"Ho my god." 

I said as I dug my nails into his back, first he started a slow rhythm and after a few minutes he accelerated. We continued like that for a while until I felt an orgasm going up, and then I felt my boyfriend's body tense, he was moaning and Hank only moans when he's gonna come, when he finish he gave me a little kiss on my forehead.

"Did you finish sergeant?"

"Yes, you are beautiful." 

"You are perfect." 

"You are the only one who thinks that." 

That's true, I was probably the only person in the world who saw his good side, he's a very kind man, but as always, people get carried away by appearances. And Hank looked like something pretty horrible. All I know is that I love him, and nothing is going to change that.

"Hank baby?." 

"Yes sweaty?." 

"I love this moments with you and everything but you're heavy and you're crushing me" We laughed and he got off of me, latter in the night we turn in.

We were comfortable and warm in bed, when I felt his arm wrap around my waist "something happened" I thought.

"It's everything alright?"

"It's nothing, do not worry" of course something happened, He's so stubborn. 

"Hank please tell me."

"It's just that..." he took a deep breath.

"You're the only honest thing I have in my life right now and I love you" 

"I love you too Hank."

That was so weird, the only thing I could think was that Hank trusted my honesty, and he could trust me, I'm sure of that. But could I trust him?.


	2. I did things and hurt people who didn't  deserve to be hurt.

It was me and my TV again tonight, Hank was very deep in a case and I haven't heard from him all day. I knew something was wrong but I had to wait for him to showed up. I found a movie that I like and I got so involved in it, that I didn't notice when Hank opened the door.

"Hey (Y/N)!"

"Good God you scared me! Did nobody ever told you not to scare a cop?"

Was he crazy? I could've shot him.

"You're right I'm sorry."

He sat next to me and gave me a kiss, he looked so distracted, I confirmed my suspicion that something was wrong.

"How was your day?"

"It was normal, we solved the case and put the bad guy behind bars were he belongs. What about you, How was your day?"

"The same as you, we solved the case the bad guy went prison, what else can I say."

"That explanation is good enough for me."

He kissed me on the forehead.

"Hank you look distracted."

"No I don't, please don't start, I'm not in the mood."

It felt like a stab, it was always the same, Hank always puts walls between me, him and his true feelings about certain things.

"You're right I'm sorry for taking an interested in your life." I was so mad.

"I'm not in the mood, I'm going to bed."

He kissed me and went to my room, I followed him an hour later when my movie ended. I quietly lay turning my back at him, I didn't want to wake him up. Just before falling asleep I felt his hand wrapping around my waist.

"It was a bad day."

"I know."

"I did things and hurt people who didn't deserve to be hurt."

I turned around to see his face, he looked more guilty than ever.

"I don't understand Hank."

"Remember Kim's boyfriend? He's FBI and he was obstructing my case, so I made Kim choose between her boyfriend and her job."

"My God Hank."

"The relationship ended apparently"

"What do you want me to tell you, I'm not agree with what you did."

"I know, I could've done things differently, but at the moment that was the decision that seemed better for me and the team" I got really upset whit the that last comment.

"You didn't make that decision Hank, Kim did."

"Don't bust my balls, I feel bad enough as it is."

It's true he looked pretty guilty, I hate to see him like that

"Okay sweaty look, Kim also made her decision she could've chose her boyfriend but she chose her job" He still looked guilty.

"Hank my love, don't think to much off this, it wasn't all your fault they are adults and they both made their decisions."

"I know, but I did something else and I think it was worse than what I did to Burguess."

"Whatever it is you can tell me."

"You wouldn't understand."

"Try me."

"No (Y/N) I can't tell you, but trust me, it's bad, someone put his trust in me and I threw him under the bus"

"Congressman Graynor, right?" He just nodded

"He felt empathy for us cops, but when he needed my empathy I didn't gave him any."

You could see the pain in his eyes, I would like to be able to say the right words and make his suffering disappear, but I knew that nothing I said would change something, so I just caressed his face and looked into his eyes.

"I know that you think that I don't, but I do know you, and well enough to know that whatever you did was for a reason."

"You really trust me don't you?"

"Of course I do."

"I see, thank you (Y/N). I love you."

"I love you too, but why are you thanking me for? I wasn't that much of a help."

"You did help, and more than you think."

I smiled, those words coming from him were one of the most beautiful things I heard and I will never forget them.

"We should sleep baby." He gave me a kiss.

"Goodnight Hank."

"Goodnight baby."

I kissed him before we curled up and slept peacefully, at least I did, I could imagined that Hank was still feeling pretty bad. I did what I could to calm his conscience but I guess Hank's conscience needs more than just a few words of encouragement.


	3. You're sure about that?

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> You forget a little about all of your problems and spend a beautiful night whit the love of your life, but you're tired of all the secrets...

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I corrected the previous chapters.
> 
> I really hope you can enjoy this new chapter, lot's of people have nicknames so I added tha Y/N/N (Your nickname) tough it will be cute <3.
> 
> This episode is recreated in the middle of episode 9 season 5 "Monster".

Maybe it's the cold weather or maybe I cought the flu, but I felt like shit. It's weird I don't have allergies, I just feel like crap.

My job definitely didn't make it any easier, the case that we had in our desk, was for lack of a better word: horrible. A two year old little girl was raped by non other than her father, she was bleating, she had bruises all over her tiny body, because on top of all, she was poorly fed, it was one of those cases that made you lose your faith in humanity. But my faith in humanity or wherever, wasn't important now, the most important thing was that little girl. The father of course was nowhere to be found.

There's no clues, we had no idea were to start and I think i'm gonna puke. My sergeant was freaking out, we had to find this guy, we just had to.

"What about you (Y/L/N), you don't have any suggestions on how to cacht this mother fucker!" Ho this is great, he's being an ass.

"No more that you seargent."

"Well would you look at that, and she's the smart one in this dump, we are fucked!"

"What do you want me say sergeant, the guy has non know associates, no friends or family, no credit cards, no nothing"

My partner, was tired of our boss yelling at me so he intervened.

"He hasn't left the state, we got eyes on every exit, bus stations, airports, we gonna find him, it's just matter of time."

We kept going to all the clues, questioning people, until finally we cought a break, a man saw him renting a car, he was renting a car when he saw him whit another two year old.

"I was talking to the receptionist and saw this man whit his toddler getting in to a car that he just rented, the kid looked awkward."

"That's great sr, was it a boy or a girl?"

"It was a girl, she had to be no more than two years hold"

"How did the little girl look like sr?"

"She was hispanic, you know black long hair, tan looking skin, dark ayes."

"You think that if we bring you to the station whit us, you can talk to a sketch artist?"

"Sure anything I could do to help." 

Great this horrible raping case just became a kidnapping case , just what I needed. But at least the witness was cooperating, I love collaborating witnesses they are the difference betwen solving the case and getting stuck. Just when I was happy because we finally cought a break, I got a texto from Hank.

'(Y/N) don't know what time I'm gonna get out of the district, so I'm gonna sleep in my place tonight' Ho great I wasn't baby, I was (Y/N).

'Fine'

All that I wanted was to get home and cuddle whit my boyfriend and possibly have some sex, confronting and relaxing sex. But that's not gonna happen, besides I don't have time to think about Hank and his mood swings anyways.

We track the car's GPS and found the pervert assholl, he was hiding in a abandoned house outside the city. The guy took baby hostage and gave us the perfect excuse to kill him.

He was on the porch, the house was surrounded and he had a gun to the baby's head.

"Sr we can make this right, just let the baby go."

"Nobody can help me!" I was trying to mediate whit him, but it was imposible.

"Sr we can help you, just put the gun down"

"You're stupid or what? nobody can help me! this ends now!"

He put the gun in his head and, kill himself, the baby girl fell to the floor, she was crying mess, I took her in my harms and I tried to calm her.

"Shhh it's gonna be ok baby, it's gonna be ok."

We took her to the distric and Child Services came to pick her up, I said goodbye and she left. For some weird reason that I don't understand, I been having a strong maternal instinct lately, some much that I was sad to see the little girl go, and partner my notice.

"Hey, are you ok?"

"Yes, I'm ok, it's just that... I feel bad for those poor little girls, nobody deserves what happened to them. I just wish that we could've done more for them."

"Hey, we saved them, that's all the matters now, ok?"

"I know."

My partner's intuition was telling him that something was wrom .

"Hey it's everything ok (Y/N/N)? your not acting like yourself lately, you can talk to me you know, we're friends."

How was I suppose to answer him? if I myself didn't know what was wrong whit me, but it was nice that someone worried.

"I'm fine Kenny, I'm just tired, but thank you so muh for caring."

"Hey it's my job we're partners." He gave me the most warm smile.

"Go home, you look like you could can use a break."

We said goodbye and I went home, that's right to my empty apartment.

I was so exhausted but I felt like taking a nice long, warm and relaxing bath, so I put some music and submerge in the warm water.

My body was drained but some how I was feeling a little bit horny, the feeling of the warm water in my nipples, was make them hard, there were so sensible. I started to pinch them a little, then I went to my pussy, I touched my clit and it felt so good.

I was tired but it's been so long since I had sex, Hank was busy all the time, so I needed some relief, my fingers on my clit felt so good, I began to rub my clit whit my right hand and pinching my nipples whit the other, it was so good, not like Hank's cock or his tongue, but it felt good, so good that I started to moan loudly, my ayes were closed I was just focused on feeling, I was imagining Hank's tongue on my pussy and stroking my breasts, suddenly I felt an orgasms going up, and finally exploiting all over my body, I screamed. When it finish I couldn't move, my ayes were still closed, I trying to hold my breath, wen I heard my boyfriend clearing his throat I turn my head and there he was! standing in the door entry looking relaxed and whit huge boner.

"Hank what are you doing here? I thought that you're wont coming."

"Yeah I can see that, you look beautiful baby, all soap and wet."

He got close to the bathtub and he caress my face.

"We're you thinking of me baby?"

He kissed me, hard, passionate, almost animalistic and then he broke the kiss.

"Yes of course I was thinking of you."

He gave a mischievous smile and started to unbuckle his belt, he took of his pants and he offer his hard cock to me.

"Suck it baby, you know how I like it."

I took it, and I stroked it whit my fingers, but of course he wanted more.

"Don't use your hands baby, use your beautiful mouth."

And so I did, I sucked and licked, Hank was losing he's mind, he had me grabbed by the hair, I licked his balls, I sucked them, they tasted so good, he tasted so good, he took his cock out of my mouth.

"How about if I join you princess." I nodded, I needed him inside me.

He took his clothes of, seeing him taking his clothes of was a delight to my ayes, for me he was the sexiest man alive when he finished he join me in the bathtub.

"Hey."

"Hey."

"Come here baby."

Valerie from Amy Winehouse was on. We kissed slowly but passionate, I went down to his neck, I licked it, I sucked it, maybe I left a couple hikies, but he did not seem to mind.

I put his hard cock inside my pussy, it felt so good, I started to go up and down, his hands were clinging to my ass, I was moaning so loud, I felt the second orgasm of the night going up, it was intense, Hank clung harder to my ass and he began to moan, he was about to come, I could feel it.

"My God, I coming."

"Come baby I want to feel your come in muy pussy."

"Jesus you're so fucking hot."

He came, apparently it was a lot, I felt my pussy so full of his come, I love that feeling, I was gonna pull it out, but he stopped me.

"No, leave in there for a moment."

I staded in there, and kiss him, I love him so much, he's my everything.

"I love you."

"I love you too princess, you're the best part of my day."

We had a sweat moment in the bathtub. He held my face, stroked my nose with his, looking into each other's eyes, it was perfect. That night we slept like we haven't slep in days, together and happy, just loving us.

The next morning I made breakfast and we sat down and started eating, but I had a doubt in my mind and I needed to clear it up, before any of us went to work.

"Hank baby, I tough that you're gonna sleep at your place last night."

"Yes, I was gonna, but I needed to see you."

"Why?"

"Because I love you of course."

"You're sure about that?"

I gave him a defiant look.

"Of course I love you, don't ever doubt my love for you."

"It's hard not to."

"I know, I also know that I haven't been the best boyfriend in the world lately, but believe me I love you."

"I love too Hank."

"I know you do, I don't know why, but you do." He talked like nothing was happening, but he's not fooling anyone or at least he's not fooling me, I know he has a lot going on right now, but I was having such a wonderful morning that I didn't want to go deeper in to our problems right now.

He finished eating fast, and left for work. Latter that morning I went to work, muy partner burst my happiness bubble. "Hey good morning (Y/N), you look happy." he smiled "I'm guessing that you and Hank, you know." "Good morning and it's not your business, but yes we did." "That's great, I'm really happy for Hank, I bet he's all stress out about the judge Wells case, is nice that he has someone like you to make him forget about his stressful jod." "What? he's handling that case? he didn't told me."


	4. It was Ruzenk wasn't it?

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Hank doesn't handle Ruzek's betray and Jay stupidity all the well.

Judge Wells daughter died yesterday morning from an overdose, news travels fast I heard the minute that happen, but what I didn't know was that Intelligence was working on that case, everybody thought that Dany Woods team was handling it, but nop, it was Intelligence, it made sence but, you'll think that if your boyfriend is working in a case that big that he's going to tell you, but no, that wasn't my case.

I spend most of the morning in silent, first because of my situation with Hank, second because I felt horrible my stomach was killing me, it must be the stress. Rixton knew that my attitude was because of what he said and he was right for the most part, he felt guilty I could see it. 

We were driving to a witness house and Kenny broke the ice.

"Hey (Y/N/N) I feel bad."

"Bad about what?"

"About what I said earlier, about judge Wells daughter case, maybe Hank wanted to tell you himself and I blow it."

"It's a big case Kenny and this city is smaller than you think, I was going to find out eventually."

"Yes but Hank."

"Hank was never going to tell me ok? He never does."

Rixton gave me that look, that "poor thing, her boyfriend doesn't tell her anything" it was humiliating.

"He never tells you anything about noting? That's hard to believe."

"He never tells me anything about his cases."

"See he tells you things just not about his work, he's looking out for you."

"Rixton what's wrong whit you?"

"What?"

"I know that Hank is your friend and everything, but you are my partner, you understand that!? mine not his, mine, I really need you to get your head around that and stop defending him."

"Ok, but he's good guy (Y/N/N) and he loves you, I just want you to know that."

"I know that."

That day went by quickly, I lef the station around 10:00 pm and I went straight to Hank's, I was tired of him not trusting me, I was his girlfriend not a stranger, enough was enough.

It was 11:00pm and no sign of Hank, I know that he's not at the district, I tried texting him, no response, I tried one last time.

'Baby where are you?'

'I'm on my way home, I'll call you when I get there.'

'Ok.'

I wasn't going to tell him, I'm his little surprise of the night. It was around 12:00pm when I saw him parking his suv in front of his house.

"(Y/N) what are you doing in here, you know what time it is don't you?"

"Nothing special I just wanted to se you."   
"Ok, let's go inside is frezeen out here." We got inside the house. Hank took my coat.

"Baby where were you? It's pretty late."

"I know, I was at Jay's he really fuck up today."

"What did he do?"

"I don't want to talk about it."

Ho great another thing he didn't tell me, I couldn't hold it anymore "Hank sit down, we need to talk."

"Here we go."

"Why didn't you tell me that you were in charge of the daughter of the judge case, I had to found out from someone else."

"I'm not in the mood for this crap (Y/N)."

"You're never in the mood for sharing Hank."

"This is ridiculous, I didn't tell you because is not your damn business (Y/N), I dont owe you any explanation about what I do or don't in my unit, and why the hell do you care so much?"

"Dont talk to me like that and what do you mean, why the hell do I care so much?"

"Yes I want an explanation, because this isn't normal."

"You're my boyfriend baby I care about everything in your life, I love you."

"No, you don't love me, if you did, you'll understand my reasons and respect them and also respect my space not showing up in here in the middle if the night."

"So you can, but I don't!" I was so mad, he could be such an ass.

"And by the way Hank you have a key to my apartment, so you didn't have to wait for me in the cold like I just did!"

Hank had the key to my apartment I gave it to him for our one year anniversary, not only because it's practical but because I love him, unlike him, he never wanted to. He let me in and hang out in his house while he got out, did his thing and came back but never gave me his key.

"I didn't ask you to give me your key, you did it because you wanted to and I'm not obligated to do the same."

"You don't give me your a key because you don't trust me!"

"Why the hell are you so upset for this, do you have any idea how suspicious you sound?"

"Ho my God you're insane! you seriously think that I'm what? in cahoots whit the people that wants to hurt you, it's that what you're thinking?"

"Today I realized that I can trust anyone." I knew something had happened.

"What happened today Hank?"

"I don't want to talk about it."

"You found the rat in your unit didn't you?" He didn't answer me, he just stood there.

"It was Ruzenk wasn't it?" Still no answer.

"I knew it, I told you, didn't I tell you?" He laugh.

"Yes you told me."

"What are you gonna do?" No answer.

"I'm not going to tell you! You need to get this shit inside that pretty head of yours, I don't have to explain anything to you! It's my unit, my detectives, you never understand shit!"

By this point I was sitting in the couch and Hank was standing in front of me, tears stared to fall from my ayes and he saw it.

"You're crying (Y/N) seriously? I'm not in the mood for this."

"You're not in the mood for anything lately."

"What's that suppose to mean?" I wanned to hurt him, just like he hurt me.

"Well you did find me jerking off in the bathtub yesterday, maybe if you've fuck me more often I wouldn't ended having sex whit my fingers."

He sat down, he was defeated and he knew it.

"Maybe is the age thing, maybe you can't handle me anymore."

He looked at me with so much pain in his ayes.

"We'll talk in the morning I'll take Justin's old room, you sleep in mine."

"No, Hank I'm leaving.

"What? is too late, you're staying the night, end of discussion."

"Who do you think you are? telling me what to do, you're not my boss Hank."

"I said, you're sleeping in here it's too dangerous out there at this hour!"

"Don't yell at me, I told you since day one, I'm not a member in your unit, I'm not intimidated by you. I'm your girlfriend not a part of your team."

He laughed, I know him, he was gonna throw punch at me. "You think that you're my girlfriend?" Ho fuck this is gonna hurt.

"You think that I love you? that you're my girlfriend? you're just the pretty little thing I'm fucking and the only reason that I pretend to care it's because I don't wan to stop fucking you, that's it sweaty."

I couldn't belive it, he was hurt and tired but still those words were too cruel.

"Go fuck yourself Hank." I said with a defeated voice. 

Hank went to kitchen, I was going to call a cab, but for some razon that goes beyond my comprehension I decided to follow him to the kitchen. 

When I got the kitchen I saw him sitting in the breakfast table in the dark 'what a drama queen' I thought to myself.

I needed him so badly so I stroked his face, his grey hair, looked at his beautiful ayes. I was so angry and he was too, but he corresponded my kiss, it was passionate, I sat on his lap facing him and started removing his shirt without separating our kiss, he also did the same with my shirt, he kissed my neck and I finished taking off his shirt he also finally took my shirt off, we were in a hurry.

He lifted me by my ass and place me on the kitchen table, I leaned back so he take off my pants and he didn't waste any time, you could see the fury in his ayes while he abruptly removed my pants and pantys.

I was completely naked at the kitchen table, we were looking at each others ayes the all time; legs wide open, totally at his mercy and I love that. He took a chair and sit, he was facing my pussy directly.

"Dinner is served." He said before sticking his face in my intimacy.

I Opened my legs even more, I grabbed his head, he was licking my clit and he put his fingers inside me, he knows how to make me come, it only took a few seconds wen I felt the heat going up, my orgasm came and took over me, I scream so hard that the neighbors probably heard me.

My orgasm drained me, but he wasn't going to stop, he got up from the chair and unbuckled his belt, while we looked into each other's eyes, he pulled his cock out of his pants without taking them off and put himself inside me, he started to fuck me hard, I couldn't stop moaning and neither could he which it was weird because he almost never moaned.

We kept looking into each other's eyes, only taking them off when he came down to kiss me while he kept fucking, he was being an animal, however his kisses were so sweet. We were getting on in hard and heavy for a while, until I reached my second orgasm, he notice this of course, he knows my body like the palm of his hand and increase his pace, when I finish I felt his rhythm diminished and becoming erratic. He was also coming, he grabbed my hand with more strength and began to moan uncontrollably in my neck, I felt something hot inside me, that feeling was the best thing in the world.

After he came he began to caress my face and put nose with mine, he was still inside me, he kissed me as if it were the last time and that hurt, all this had hurt, it was an incredible fuck, but every caress however pleasant was filled with the pain of knowing that maybe I would never feel anything like this again, not with him at least.

We got dressed without saying a word, I went to the living room and called a cab, Hank stayed in the kitchen, the cab came I didn't say good bye, I left whiteout looking back, our relationship was destroyed, words are weapon of massive destruction.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Of course the porn has to go!!! <3 but speaking a little bit more serious, everyone has gone trough that, people have bad days and they pay it with there love one's, your words become a nuclear missile, we've all done that no matter how mature we are. 
> 
> Thank you for reading my work, if you like it please have a little patience with the updates, I promise to update more often.


	5. Lady

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> You caught a very curious case that has more questions that answers.

I haven't heard from Hank in over two weeks and I can't denied that I miss him every hour of every day.  
Even my body was experiencing physical manifestations from the pain and the stress of break up, I was nauseous and hungry all of the time, maybe I got anxiety issues  
My partner didn't knew about the break up, I didn't told him, he felt guilty as it is about blabbing his mouth the other day, like he betrayed Hank's trust  
We caught a under age prostitution case, we got a tip from a mom that suspected that her daughter was selling herself. She fallow her, and gave us the address, it was a nice hotel.  
We enter the hotel and found the room, it was disgusting, and old man he had to be more than sixty and the girl looked sixteen.  
"Chicago PD put your hans when we can see them."  
"You, get dress!" I toss her dress to the girl.  
We took them both to the precinct.  
We put them in differents interrogation rooms and questioning begin, the girl was a peace of work, she had a nice live but she was selling herself because she's a brat with very expensive taste and she had mouth on her too.  
"You're saying that this man didn't forced you any way?"  
"No, he gave me what I needed and I gave him what he needed."  
"Money?"  
"Of course lady that's what everyone needs."  
"You mean like a hooker."  
"No, like a relationship, he gives me money I give him sex."  
"Look Tracy or wherever your name is."  
"It's Stacy!"  
"What you are saying Stacy is the definition of prostitution."  
"What ever lady, how you guys found me anyways?"  
"Your mother was concern and she help us find you."  
"My mother rated me out, that bitch!"  
"She was worried and frankly she's right, you're in a loot of trouble."  
"Look lady, just let me go ok? My life it's not of your business."  
"I can't let you go, your being charged with solicitation. You are going to jail sweaty."  
"No! I can't go to prison."  
"Unless that you give me the name of your pimp."  
"Fuck you lady!"  
"Yeah well, I hoped your bitch of a mother, can pay for a good lawyer my dear because you're gonna needed."  
"Lady wait!"  
"It's detective."  
"Ok detective, look I don't want to go to jail but I'm not a rat, so... maybe if you were to check my phone and found something." I smiled.  
"Then you wouldn't be a rat kid."  
She gave me her password, I felt like I won the lottery, this almost never happens.  
I got out of there, that girl presence was smoldering, sure she was helping but she was insufferable and also I needed to check out how was the old guy interrogation going, I look through the window, two of my other partners were given him a peace of there minds.  
"What the fuck it's wrong whit you man, she's sixteen."  
"Yeah man you are going to get charged with statutory rape."  
"I didn't know she was a minor, I swear."  
Rixton join me.  
"How's it going lady?"  
"It's not funny. He's denying that he knew she was a minor."  
"But he knew."  
"Of course he did, but you know he's innocent until proving guilty."  
"Well he's not saying shit and he's not gonna."  
"We don't need him."  
We check the girls phone and found her pimp's phone number and some other name pop out, some women named Trish, she had like 10 calls from her number, it was weird but we focus our attention on finding the pimp, we had every patrol in the district looking for this guy and on top of all my problems I couldn't stop thinking about Hank, idiot stuffs like, what is he doing right now? is he thinking about me? that sore of bullshit that people who are in loved think about.  
Sergeant Mayers decided to call it a night so Kenny and I went to have some dinner I was starving, I order a giant cheese burger, with fries and a chocolate milkshake, I've never try it, i'm always watching my wait but now for some reason I didn't care I was just hungry. Kenny couldn't believe it.  
"Are you sure that you can eat that."  
"I'm hungry Rixton shut up."  
We laugh and kept eating.  
"Hey (Y/N) not that is any of my business but you and Hank broke up didn't you? you're my friend, you can't talk to me, I worried yo know"  
"Yes we did."  
"You want to talk about it?"  
"Not with you I don't."  
"Why not? I know that he didn't hurt you, he wouldn't do that."  
"So he's the innocent victim?"  
"No! That's not what I'm saying, nobody it's the victim, you're booth adults, you probably got sick of each other."  
"That's not what happen! see this is exactly why I hate that you're my partner."  
"Why, what did I do?"  
"Look kenny you're a great partner and get the whole male camaraderie thing that you have with Hank, but he's my ex and you're my partner do you have any idea how weird it is for me? How many times do I have to tell you!"  
"I understand (Y/N/N), look you're right, you're my partner, I care about you, so from now on, no more Hank."  
"I'll appreciate that, thank you."  
"You are very much welcome and speaking of other things, this women that pop out in the girl's phone, you're sure that you don't want to check that out?"  
"I don't know she doesn't show up in our system and that number is a disposable, non of my CI's knows about her, maybe she doesn't belong to that world".  
"Maybe, but I have a feeling."  
"Me too bur maybe she's a family member o something."  
Right in that moment, we got a phone call, it was our sergeant, a patrolman found our pimp and arrested him.  
Kenny and I were the first in our team to arrive at the precinct, so the interrogation was ours, but our boss had a different plan.  
"(Y/L) you'll go with me." Rixton looked visibly disappointed. My boss is one of those old school cops, so it's always fun to do interrogations with him.  
Mayers was the first one to talk "You know how this works, you help us, we'll help you.  
"You don't have anything to offer me dude."  
"How about the jail time that we gonna give you?"  
"You don't have anything on me man, but I want to be all over that beautiful thing."  
He looked at me practically drooling and, it was gross. My sergeant punch him hard.  
"What the hell it's wrong whit you?." I said amused.  
"That's police brutality."  
"And what you did is statutory rape."  
"What do you mean? I didn't rape anyone."  
"Ho au contraire my man you did."  
"I didn't rape anyone lady!"  
"Why is everyone calling me lady today?"  
My sergeant punch him again.  
"You rape Tracy, remember?"  
"It's Stacy and I never had sex whit her."  
"That's bullshit and you know it, every pimp tryst out his girls at least one's, so save it. That and the drugs we found on you, you're going to be looked up for a very long time."  
"There's got to be something we can do a deal perhaps, you said it, I'll help you."  
"You don't have anything to offer us dude."  
"I can give you a big name, a mademe is recluting under age girls."  
"Tell us."  
"Not without a deal, dump the rape charge."  
"That's not gonna happen."  
"You're sure? I can give you an address and everything."  
I look at my sergeant, he makes an approve gesture. "Fine, spit it out."  
"Her name is Trish, she wasn't like this at first, she only worked whit high in, educated, first class girls, they there all legal and they did it because they wanted, she didn't forced anyone, but her client list got bigger and more demanding."  
"What do you mean more demanding."  
"Well her list goes from police sargeants, lieutenants, commanders to congressmen, people in the mayor's office, district attorneys and your regular rich gyus. The list goes on and on" Fucker knew everything.  
"Lately her clients are getting demanding and she's recluting under age girls, that's why she been calling my Stacy."  
"You're gonna give me her location."  
The man gave us an address, our boss didn't wanted to and he looked visibly nervous, I knew he was hiding something, . At the end we ask for search warrant, it wasn't going to be ready until next morning so we call it a night. My boss was still a little sketchy but I didn't care, muy gut was telling something and I wasn't going to stop until I find out what the hell is going on.

Are you sure that you can eat that.


	6. Some fishes are better for us than others.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Lifes sucks for (Y/N) in this chapter a lot of truest get out.
> 
> I hope you enjoy reading this as much as I loved writing it <3

The next morning after the pimp let out all about Trish was weird, my boss looked worried, but it was very subtle, I notice it because i'm a women and we're good in noticing stuffs like this, but the rest of the guys didn't notice shit, they were too busy being happy, because the search warrant was here. We got ready, Rixton was helping me to put my best on and was curious.

"How is that we didn't know anything about this Trish person and that low life pimp did."

"I don't know, I think is weird something doesn't add up, lets just be careful and hope for the best."

The address led us to an apartment in a very exclusive building in a very nice area, I'm pretty sure that she didn't lived there, I bet that's just a place that she had on the side. We enter the apartment and it was beautiful; well decorated and clean.

We proceed to search the apartment and we didn't found anything, not at first. I went to the master bedroom by myself, I. check the nightstand and I saw it, a little pink book I opened and saw names, numbers, addresses, maybe it was pink but this was her little black book of clients. 

I knew this was big, I knew that list was going to change peoples lifes so I kept reading the names, I saw some familiar ones, man I don't in person but I know who they were, man I knew, man I respected, marry man, with children, with lifes, with importan jobs, man which lifes were going the get ruined by this little pink book, I was about to close it when I saw it.

Henry 

Just that, no last name, no address, just a phone number that recognaized , it was hank's secret phone number that he kept from like everything else, I heard footsteps, this couldn't get out, it will ruined his life, no mention the humiliation that everyone found out that your ex prefers the company of prostitutes, that your own, it was a small book so I put it in my jacket.

"Hey you found something?"

"No, nothing, the bedroom it's clean."

"It's weird, they usually hide stuff in the bedrooms."

"Well this is a very weird lady."

We heard a voice coming from the living room.

"Hey! We found something!"

It was flash drive, it had pictures from under age girls they all looked fourteen maybe sixteen, they were wearing school girls outfits, dolls outfits, it was all so childlike, this women was in big trouble.

Every patrol officer in the distric was looking for this Trish women, we search her fingerprints, her name was fake, her real name was Lilith Newhart; married with a rich doctor husband, two kids a house on the suburbs, she had a good life apparently a clean one too, she didn't even had a parking ticket. 

It was already 1:00 am we were exhausted, so we went home, hoping that tomorrow we have better luck.

I was drained when I got home but I remembered the little pink book of the devil, so I ketp reading it and like I suspected my sergeant's name was in there including dates and preferences, I laugh when I saw that he liked redheads, Hank's preferences and dates were there too but I didn't watch, I couldn't it was to much for me to handle right now. Just the thought of him fucking a prostitute made me ran to the bathroom to vomit.

When I got out of the bathroom I was exhausted, I felt that I was going to pass out, so I went straight to bed, I couldn't believe that my Hank the most wonderfull man I ever met did this to me. I was getting ready to go to bed when I heard someone knocking at the door.

"Who is it?"

"Jay!" What the hell, What is he doing here? I opened the door.

"What are do doing here?"

"Will is on a date, so I need a place to crash for the night y maybe eat something?" He looked visibly ashamed, but what else can I do, he's my friend, I did what any friend will do, serve him a cold beer, a hot meal and sat with him so he could tell me all about his sorrows.

"You're not drinking any?"

"No, my stomach is not feeling good and I don't think beer it's gonna help, can you please tell him what's going on?"

"Fine I'll tell you."

He told me about him falling for some drug addicted girl who he met when he was under cover, but he had to arrest her because Hank found out and he made him do it, he then continue to talk about Hank an the fact that he was being a complete douchebag and that he liked destroying his detectives relationships like he did whit Burgess and her FBI boyfriend. Jay was heartbroken, he really liked this girl, it was sad, I mean he was stupid but a felt sad for him.

"This is just like Erin you know?"

"No it's not, you're not in loved, you just like the way this Camille girl fucks, that's it, Erin was true love."

"She was and I blew it."

"Don't be to hard on yourself, there's plenty of fish on the sea."

"Didn't you one's told me that sometimes some fish are better for you than others?"

I laugh very loud "Man I say stupid when I'm drunk, but it's true you know." 

"I know that now, still I think Voight is being to much of an assholl lately, he always is but lately he's gettin worse and worse, but I don't need to tell you about that."

"Ho I hear you, but I think he's just scared to dead about his future, with this Woods thing you never know and he hates not knowing."

"We all do, but yes he's been under a lot of stress lately."

"That doesn't give him any razon to be an assholl, he's a big man and he needs to get his shit together."

We heard the door from next door, it was Will, it looks like his date didn't go so well. 

"I guess I have to go, thank you for listening me, it's not easy to hear the sad story of an idiot cop." I laughed so hard.

"Hey no problem."

"Are you ok?" 

"Yes I'm, why do yo ask?"

"Because you look like shit, no offends."

"You're an idiot Jay, i'm fine jus tired, now get out of here."

"Have a good night."

"You too."

Jay went to sleep at his brother. I was so tired I the I felt asleep when my head hit the pillow and tomorrow promises to be another shity day.


	7. Madame Trish museum of broken families.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> You finally face reality.

"Flashback"

"Ho my god" 

Hank stopped his pumping and he stare at my ayes for a moment, he was grabbing my hands, with one of his, and he had them over my head.

"You're so beautiful, I can't believe my luck."

He kiss me, it was sweet and gentle, we been seeing each other for only a couple of months but I was fallin in loved with him whiteout realising it, he wasn't like I expected, he was a good man, gentle and sweet.

He let go of my hands and I grabbed his back, he kept fucking me, he was being hard but it felt so god. We been doing this for the last two hours, we were exhausted but we couldn't stop and when we finally did it was because we were hungry not because we couldn't or because we didn't wanted to, we could do this all night long.

"(Y/N) you're hungry? I can order some chinese or pizza, wherever you want."

"Chinese sounds great baby."

"Perfect I'll make tha call, you want water? I'm really thirsty for some razon."

He gave me a mischievous smile and he kiss me.

"I don't know sergeant maybe it was all those extra hours you been working on my pussy."

"That was dirty baby, where have you been all of this years?" He grabbed my face and put his finger inside my mouth I bit it, but I let go in a second.

"Go, I'm thirsty and if we keep this going we're going star fucking again."

"Jesus you have a dirty mouth!"

"You love my dirty mouth." We heard his phone.

"Great, I can't have a moment of peace, I'll be right back baby, let me take this phone call, I'll get you your water."

"It's ok go."

He smiled and left, I heard his steps going towards the kitchen, I didn't care that he left the room to answer the phone call, that was his work phone and I understand that, work is a delicate thing. 

I was going to get up to go to the bathroom, when I heard a vibration sound, like a phone vibrating, it was weird, I thought about leave that alone, but my curiosity took the best of me, so I stared to look it up, I was easy to find, it was in one if his nightstand drawer, it was an old flip phone, it kept vibrating the number was an unknown, you could see it on the little screan, I didn't opened of course, when it finally stoped vibrating, I opened it, I check everything I could, but there was nothing, so I went to setting to see if I could find the phone's number and I did, I took my phone and I saved it. I wasn't sneaky person, but I don't know I just did it, my gut was telling me to do it, I know Hank so I wiped my fingerprints whit a tissue, and I put the phone exactly the way it was, I heard Hank foot steps going up the stairs, so I acted like noting happen.

"You know, I love you call me sergeant."

"Yeah, it adds something isn't?" He gave me a bottle of water.

"I'm sorry I kept you waiting, I was work you understand."

"I do."

"Chinese will be here in any minute baby, you must be hungry."

See, this was Hank, a great man, a caring man, not that monster that people talk about, he was different, sure that phone thing was weird but, it must be a work thing, who knows maybe when we trust each other a little bit more he tells me himself about it. 

"End of flashback"

To think that if maybe I haven't found that phone that night, than this phone that I found in this bitchs book, wouldn't meant anything, but I found it and I know is Hank's, he never told me about that phone, I never asked mainly because I forgot about it.

I been starting at the little pink book from hell for three days, Trish or Lilith or wherever her name was asked for a lawyer so having access to her was getting more and more difficult, we couldn't find more evidence against her and the worst part of all is the I was sitting in a key piece evidence it was there in my coffee table, that book could get us everything we needed, but I couldn't do it, my sergeant's name was there and Hank's too, this a is career ruin evidence, there's no way in hell I'm going to give it to anyone. On the other end that doesn't mean that I couldn't reed it, I had to, this is my ex and this is the razon why he was acting like such assholl with me lately. 

So there I was, feeling sick and stress out, sitting in my couch whit the little black book from madame Trish museum of broken families on my coffee table, I was scared to death but I needed to see his preferences and his dates, maybe this is the final push that I need to finally stop loving him.

I opened and I saw it, some girl named Nicole 'slut name' I thought, he saw her three times until now, I didn't realize but I was crying, tears were falling from my ayes, I been doing a lot of that lately, crying without even notice it.

The worst part was the dates, he saw her the day after we broke up, two days after that and last saturday. I couldn't belive it, now everything makes sence I knew he was acting like a dick for some razon, but I didn't know it was this bad.

"What the hell it's wrong whit him?" I said to myself.

I really wanted to turn that book, ruin Hank's life but I couldn't, maybe because in some way I thought that it was my fault, maybe I didn't satisfied him or something. But them I thought 'enough was enough' I couldn't do this to myself anymore, what ever he did was because he wanted to, not because of me, I was an amazing girlfriend and it his lost, I need to move on and I need to focus on the important stuff, like this case and I was going to solve it whiteout that book from hell, so I was going to stopped being an idiot and pick myself up and go to work.

I was waiting for the elevator when I heard Will behind me.

"Good morning."

"Hey Will." He stayed there just staring at me for a moment.

"What I got something on my face?"

"No, but read the yellow tape in the elevator."

'Out off service'

"Fuck, I didn't see it."

"I can see that, are you ok?"

"I'm fine." No I wasn't.

"Really cause you don't look ok, you look like shit actually." He laughed.

"That seems to be the general opinion and stop laughing, it's not funny Will."

"I know, I'm sorry, hey let's take the stairs."

"Ho great, we live in the ten floor."

When we got to the fifth floor I got really dizzy, I almost fall of the stairs.

"Hey you're ok?" Will grabbed me and sat me down for a moment, he gave this defiant look.

"What?" He sat next to me.

"Look I told you this, two days ago after Jay left, this isn't normal, this isn't you."

"Don't say it, jus don't."

"But I have to, you are being stubborn, this is something you don't take lightly, your symptoms are more that obvious (Y/N) you're pregnant." Great he said it.

"I'm sorry if it's not what you want to hear but it's happening."

Deep down I knew I was pregnant but I was in denial, specifically these last couple if days. 

"I know I'm pregnant Will, i'm not stupid, I just don't whant to deal with this right now, I don't know if I going to have it."

"So that's why you been acting like this. You're going to get an abortion?"

"Don't say that word Will." I was crying again.

"It's your choice (Y/N), it's you're body, but I know you're not gonna do it."

"How could you be so sure?"

"Because I know you, because you love kids, because you wouldn't hurt Hank's baby, you love him."

"Will I'm going to be late for work."

We got up and and kept going, he walk me to my car.

"Look if you need something you know where to find me, please take care of yourself." I knew I was pregnant but I was in denial.

I was driving to work but couldn't focus o road and I didn't see the dog that was trying to cruzar la street I didn't hit him of course, but I almost crash against a tree. I was frozen, people were asking me if I was ok and kept telling them that I was fine and physically I was, but this needs to stop, I can't keep letting this situation with Hank to control me like this, to te point where I almost crash my car, I could've die, ir I could've kill the poor dog, or a person, but the it hit me 'I could be pregnant' I could've lost the baby. 

This incident made me realize that I wasn't going to get an abortion, that if I was pregnant, not only was I going to have it but I also was going to love him or her with all of my heart. So as a first gesture of love, towards my baby I dropped everything and went to Chicago Med.

I enter the emergency room and saw Will.

"Hey Will."

"Hey (Y/N) finally came to face reality."

"Yeap"

"Come with me I want to show you something".

I was so scared but excited at the same time, this was the beginning of a all new life for me.


	8. What the fuck was wrong with me!?

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> That pink book it's still ruining everything.

I lay on a hospital bed in a little dark room, alone. Will left me there he said that he will be here in a minute but it's been ten and i'm starting to get anxious. 

He finally enter the room.

"Hey I'm sorry I kept you waiting, I'm a little busy, but now I'm here and you got all my attention."

"Wherever Will, just tell me what you wanted to show me."

"You're gonna love this."

He turn the lights on and then he turn on the sonogram machine or whatever its name was.

"I'm going to put some gel in your belly, it's a little cold so it's going to be uncomfortable for a moment"

"Please I'm a cop, I was stab and shot man! I can take a little cold gel."

"Fine" he put the gel on my belly, dam! That thing was cold.

"My God it's really cold!"

"I told you miss I'm bad ass cop, the gel is freaking cold."

It was cold and uncomfortable but I could take it, at first you couldn't see much, but then I saw it a person an actual person, with legs, arms a head, everything a person has, it was amazing.

"Woa you're advance (Y/N)."

I was numbed, speechless, I couldn't believe it "I guess I am."

"You guess? You have for what I can see here three months."

"I guess."

"Can you say something, besides 'I guess' this is your baby, isn't this exciting?"

"Sure I'm a single mom, this is super exciting." He finally understood how I was feeling.

"Ok I'm sorry, I know this is hard for you. But you can do this I know you can." 

"I know, look lets forget all of the bad shit for a moment, what can you tell me about my baby dr?" He laugh.

"Ok miss (Y/L) you have an approximate of three months and for what I can see it's a healthy baby."

"You think I'll be a good mom?"

"Of course, I'm telling you everything it's going to be fine, for now lets just worry about you going to a good obstetrician and I have one that it's great and your health insurance covers it, so it's all good you'll see."

Will set up an appointment with the obstetrician, I left there determined to do right by this child, it was mine, I don't care that his father is being an idiot and he likes prostitutes, I laugh when I thought about that, is kind of funny if you think about it, funny in very tragic and fucked up way, but funny.

My phone had more then ten miss calls most of them from my partner, the rest from my boss. I've forgotten about the case.

When I arrived at the station my colleagues were worried, my boss too.

"Hey are you ok?"

"Yes, why wouldn't I be?

"Because according to the gps in your car, you had an accident." Busted! Stupid ass gps.

"Can you tell us whats going on with you?"

"Ok fine I almost crash in to tree, but I didn't."

"My God are you ok (Y/N)?" My partner hug me, he looked worried, everyone looked worried, this are my friends, my family, I been through a lot with them, they been by my side no matter how bad it got, they deserve to know what was going on, but I was so scared and ashamed.

"I'm fine, I went to the hospital, everything is fine."

Nobody believed me but they knew that it was the only answer that I was going to give them.

The case was stuck, no clues, no leads, no nothing, they were all frustrated and they looked visibly worried and they were right to be so, this bitch was probably selling teenagers right now as we speak and she's was probably gonna escalate we know how this works, first teenagers, then children and then her clients are going to have more and more requests, disgusting fetishes, torture and even killing, if we don't fix this is going to get worst. 

I was sitting in my desk organizing my thoughts, the team was discussing the case and I was feeling guilty, that pink book was a key piece of evidence and it was locked up in a drawer in my bedroom, what was I thinking? Putting girls in risk, for what? Saving the reputation of a bunch a perverts assholls that betrayed their families and my idiot ex? What the fuck was wrong with me!?

If I was gonna do this, I was gonna do it right, so I did what I shoulda done I enter my boss's office and I told him all about the pink black book or what I like to call it the family killer book.

"This is embarrassing." He said with such shame in his eyes.

"It sure is." I said amused.

"It's not funny."

"Hey I would laugh of my jokes if I were you." I said laughing.

"You're gonna blakmail me?"

He looked so sad and nervous, I never seen him like this, it hurt a little bit, but he deserve it.

"Ok fun time is over boss, i'm not going to blackmail you for Christ's sake, you're my family, I'm mad at you, you did cheat at my hunt." Yes my boss is my uncle, son of bitch is married to my mon sister.

"But your still family, plus you and hunt Lucille were separated at the time, I check the date don't worry." My hunt wasn't a saint she dated like two guys when they were separated, I wasn't going to tell him, but that was enough for me to give him break plus it was kind of sad.

"I know it looks bad, but me and your hunt were separated at the time and I was feeling lonely, I'm not proud of what I did."

"Hey, you don't have to explain yourself to me, I just need you to help me find a solution, this book is the answer and you know it, but we can used it, you were her client you can tell me something about her, something that sinks her, without the need to use that book."

"I want to help but that was just I one night thing, I don't know anything about her that can incriminate her, I wish I did though."

He was right he only had one "date", but there was someone else that had three dates and his name wasn't entirely clear it only said "Henry" every else had full name, address, numbers, Hank didn't the only logic explanation was that they were friends, Hank had all kinds of contacts, maybe she was one of them.

"Look (Y/L/N) you do what you got to do, we know what's gonna happen if we don't do something about madame Trish, so just do it."

"Ruining your life and your family it's not going to fix anything, but I know what to do now, I'll be right back."

"Where are you going."

"To fix this."

I went to my apartment and I took pictures of the book in all angles, especially Hank's page 'stupid disgusting Hank' I thought to myself, I wasn't going to bring the book, I didn't knew what hank's reaction was going to be, everyone knew he was a violent man so I wasn't going to risk it.

The 21 district was empty, only a few people and some patrol officers, Afther a brief discussion with Plart, she buzz me up, I was so nauseous and a little dizzy, it was my little baby, I remember the sonogram and how perfect my little cherub was, I was nervous but I had to do it, it was only way plus, maybe I'll get the closure that I need, I took a deep breath and I enter intelligence.


End file.
